Pack of Lies

by pseudonym

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1.
01:37
2.
3.
04:29
4.
5.
6.
03:19
7.
8.
9.
10.
03:06
11.
02:59
12.
13.
14.
02:53
15.
02:41

about

REVIEWS
-------------

Here's what they said about our last album, Revolving Door:

"A truly great album ... that you like a lot on the first spin, and that you come to love with each subsequent spin ... magical ... amazing ... magnificent ... stunning."
- Indie Rock Cafe

" One of the biggest surprises of 2015 ... genius ... unforgettable ... it doesn’t have to grow on you."
- Hooks & Harmony

" It’s pretty great stuff, these songs, full of great melodies and playing and vocals. The whole shooting match, in fact."
- Alan Haber's Pure Pop Radio


ALBUM NOTES
---------------------

Hi. Waylan here. To start with, hello power pop fans! Yeah we know you're out there. You may proceed directly to songs 1, 2, 4, 10, 12, and 14. We think the power pop hit here is definitely 14 (Foreign Talk). Or maybe it's 10 (Lorraine). Anyway I'm using "hit" in the loosest, most euphemistic sense of course.

Secondly, you're probably wondering why I (Waylan) am writing the album notes. I'm sure that's what you're thinking. Well the answer is, we took a vote. Paul and Cliff were not eligible because they'd already written previous album notes. Term limits. So it was between me, Gil, and the Doctor. And I'm pleased to report that I won in a landslide with 60% of the vote (3 votes)! Whoever else voted for me (Paul and Cliff I assume) probably felt sorry for me. I had sort of a rough year.

Things started going downhill last March when my girlfriend broke up with me. I didn't see it coming. Sure, yes, in hindsight the signs were there, but I must have been in denial because after 6 years together I thought we were pretty locked in. She said it wasn't me, it was us – we weren't meant to be together THIS way. Gee, good to know. Anyway I was pretty down for a while after that. I started questioning everything. I thought there's got to be more to life than this ridiculous revolving door of relationships, more to life than playing stupid insipid trivial pop songs in an obscure rock band. (Nothing against Paul's insipid pop songs, I mean they're perfectly OK, but that's how I was feeling at the time.)

I wanted to do something meaningful, to make a difference, to leave my mark on the world. Well, right around that time I happened to read about this group in the Netherlands that was planning a one-way mission to colonize Mars, and I realized THAT'S what I was going to do! I figured I'd be the perfect "astronaut pioneer". I'm creative, adaptable, good with my hands, and I didn't really have many ties keeping me here on planet Earth.

I got so excited about the idea that I started selling my "earthly" possessions on Craigslist, including my music stuff – guitars, amp, pedals – plus some furniture and clothes. You're probably thinking this might not have been the smartest of first moves. Looking back, I'm sure it was my way of symbolically breaking away from the monotony of my mediocre life. But at that point I was just thinking "I won't be needing this stuff on Mars."

I soon found out, however, that the Mars program wasn't taking any new applicants. Supposedly they already had too many. I got kind of desperate – I really believed they would take me if I had a chance to prove myself. So I used the money I made from selling my stuff to buy a plane ticket to the Netherlands.

I flew into Amsterdam, rented a car, and drove to the address of the Mars program which is in a suburb about 45 minutes from the airport. Turns out, it's just some guy's house. I rang the bell. No answer. As I was standing around out front wondering what I was supposed to do next, a neighbor walked over and asked me (in English) if I was looking for the Mars project guy. He asked if I was a reporter, and I went along with it. I said yes, I was doing an article for the San Francisco Mars Monthly. He was impressed. He told me the Mars guy wasn't home but he gave me directions to the actual Mars program office. I thanked him, took his picture, wrote his name down and told him I'd try to get him into my article.

When I got to the office address, I thought now this is more like it. The building was modern with big shiny glass, and inside there was a nice lobby and a reception desk, and a couple of young, bored looking security guys in tan uniforms. I walked up to them and said "hi! I'm Hans Reinsdorf with the San Francisco Mars Monthly. I'm here to do an article on the Mars mission. They're expecting me." I noticed that A) it was fun pretending to be a reporter, and B) I was just assuming at this point that everyone spoke English. Well, both of these guys did. They had me sign the guest book and told me which floor to go to. I took out my phone to take their picture (for the article) but they said "no photos". Of course. I'm sure NASA doesn't let you take pictures at their office either.

Stepping off the elevator I would have expected to see a sign for the Mars program. Or a receptionist. Or any people. But the only sign of life was a cleaning lady pushing a trash barrel around. I asked her where the Mars group was. She didn't speak much English but she knew the word Mars, and she pointed me to an open area with rows of work tables. So I sat down at one of the tables and waited.

I guess I was pretty tired from my trip because the next thing I knew I was waking up, my drooling face flat on the table. The office lights were off now and it was dark outside. Needless to say, there were no Mars employees anywhere in sight. I stumbled over to the elevators and pushed the button but nothing happened, so I followed the exit signs and opened the door to a stairway. A loud alarm went off. Great. I made my way down to the lobby where the alarm was even louder, and lights were flashing. I tried pushing open the front door but it was locked. Great. And outside, what should I see but a Netherlands cop car pulling up, lights flashing. Wonderful.

Two cops got out, unlocked the door, led me out by the arm, and pushed me toward the police car. I tried to explain I was just a reporter doing a story on the Mars mission. I offered to take their picture, but the cops weren't interested. They searched my backpack and spoke a bunch of Dutch and put me in the back of the car.

Netherlands prisons are pretty nice actually. At least the one they took me to. It had a library, and classrooms, and the prison cells had carpeting and were painted cheerful colors. It was nicer than my college dorm. They sat me in a room with a guy who did speak English, and he explained that there had been a wave of thefts at the office complex recently and they assumed I was robbing the place. But they hadn't found anything stolen on my person. That was good, he explained.

"What were you doing there, Mr. Solo?" Oh right, they knew who I was. I said I had just arrived from the USA to join the Mars mission and that I had fallen asleep in the office. I said the Mars mission people could vouch for me. He asked for a name. I made something up. "Bjorn is the guy's name who I was working with".

"We'll check with them in the morning" he said. I was to be detained overnight. This was OK with me since I hadn't had a chance to find a hostel or a motel yet, plus with any luck the cops would now be arranging my first meeting with someone from the Mars team!

And the next morning this boss guy from the Mars project did show up. They brought him to my cell and introduced him, I think his name was Lars. He didn't seem to be in a very good mood. "Who the hell are you?" he asked. I sort of stammered out my name, and said I was from San Francisco, and that I was here to join the Mars program. I started talking as fast as I could – I wanted to get everything in – I told him how great I would be at this astronaut business, how my girlfriend had left me and how that had made me see my true mission in life and how there was nothing tying me back to Earth and... and Lars cut me off. Lars started yelling at me. "Who do you think you are!? You don't just run away and join a space program to escape your problems with women!" And other things to that effect. I was starting to realize I would not be getting to Mars anytime soon.

Well, long story short, Lars agreed not to press charges, the police released me after a short lecture on trespassing, I went straight to the airport and got on the earliest flight back to San Francisco.

Luckily, something in the back of my mind had prevented me from quitting my job or quitting the band. I had only been away for three days, so I made some excuses for whatever I had missed and just slipped back into my previous life, which didn't seem quite so mediocre anymore. Sure, I had to borrow a guitar from Paul for a while because I had stupidly sold mine, but I was definitely coming around to thinking that maybe making music wasn't quite so pointless. And shortly after I got back, the band started recording this album. And here it is.

Um, which reminds me, I was supposed to say some stuff about the album. Well, we like it, and hope you do too!

-Waylan Solo
December 2016

credits

released January 1, 2017

Pseudonym is:

Paul Desjarlais - vocals
Cliff Notes - bass
Waylan Solo - guitar
Gil Gullible - keyboards
Dr. Rhythm - drums

(c) 2017 Trivial Pop Songs
All words and music by Paul Desjarlais. All songs performed by Pseudonym and produced by Paul Desjarlais. Recorded in an igloo (sorry about the echo), mixed in a frying pan, and mastered on medium heat for 15 minutes.

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about

pseudonym San Francisco, California

Pseudonym is a band consisting of me, Paul Desjarlais, and other real or imaginary people. Back in Boston a long time ago I used to play bass for The Uncalled Four, and then for Haberland. After that I released a cassette album called Pabz, and later a CD called Pig Tail World. Now I live in San Francisco and I record songs when I get a chance and sometimes post albums online. ... more

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Track Name: i'm fine
i'm fine with the insults
i'm fine with the cheap replies
if your aim was a low blow
you hit the bull right in the eyes
and presently
i will be
just carrying on without lengthy goodbyes

i'm ok with the slander
ok if you put me down
if your goal was surrender
well now it is all over town
and presently
eventually
i will be carrying on without you
writing stupid songs about you
and never daring to doubt you'll hold your ground

i'm fine with the insults
and i'm
ok if you put me down
Track Name: all the little things
i look around as the world comes apart
all the bad people get head starts
i look around at their artificial hearts
and make attempts at modern art

i look around and i see it's alright
despite the darkness at midnight
i get around by the artificial light
and make attempts to get it right

but i never will approach the highs you get
and i'm never gonna feel the pain
but at least you know
that all the little things come back to you someday
but at least you know
that everything comes back again

i look around by the glow of a streetlight
and fix you squarely in my sights

(chorus)
Track Name: dumb one
i confused you
when i said things like
presumptuous
you didn't understand me at all

we went places
you never heard of
we looked at things
you couldn't figure out

but since you've gone away
who is the dumb one now
and since you've gone away from me

you confused me
every time you said
don't blow me off
i never understood that at all

and now that you've gone away
who is the dumb one now
and since you've gone away from me

who is the dumb one
who isn't so bright
and who is the smart one now
who is the dumb one
who's the dumb one
and who is the smart one now

i ask you
in all honesty
what are you doing here
and please don't give me your good answers
i find they only ever mess things up

but now that you've gone away
who is the dumb one now
and since you've gone away from me

who is the dumb one...
Track Name: i don't care about love
bury the broken dreams on the
fractured boulevard
count 96 tears in my eyes
your keen understanding
reveals a basic disregard
be careful with whom
you hitch a ride
then sympathize

that's when it goes haywire
choose none of the above
don't care about love
i don't care about love

how did you obtain those eyes
how'd you come across the nose
where did you get that eagle ear
how did you prevail on me to
so easily disclose
be careful in whom
you first confide
then disappear

cuz that's when it goes haywire
take none of the above
don't care about love
i don't care about love

and you know
by the time you recall
you forgot it all
it gets too cold to feel in the fall
it's just a free for all

cuz that's when it goes haywire
that's where there's nothing there
no irons in the fire
got none of the above
don't care about love
i don't care about love
don't care about love
i don't care about love
Track Name: victimless crime
hello sunshine it's been a while
i see you've not lost that familiar smile

it happened at the time
my belief i could still suspend
and it's a victimless crime
if I wanted to believe to the end

hello sport now what's your game
the more things change the more you stay the same

got the tried and true lines
tailor made to charm an old friend
maybe there was a time
my belief i could still suspend
it was a victimless crime
when I wanted to believe to the end

what do you want
what do you want
what do you want anyway

it so happened at one time
my belief i could still suspend
and it's a victimless crime
when I wanted to believe

hello sunshine what's your game
the more things change the more you stay the same
Track Name: only life
This would be
one way to show them all
this seems like the way
to go out

some try to control the conversation
get political
but it's just a story
it's only life

out of all
the gin joints in the world
why'd she have to go
and blow up mine

some have to control the situation
get political
but it's just a story
it's only life

this could be
the biggest breakthrough that
our therapy group has
ever seen

some have to control the situation
get political
but it's just a story
it's only life
it's just a story
it's only life
Track Name: don't leave me this way
don't leave me this way
don't leave me this way
cuz how can i get through the day
if you leave me this way

don't tell me goodbye
don't tell me goodbye
my loneliness will intensify
if you tell me goodbye

you can never leave
you can never leave
cuz if you try you'll see
that you can never leave
you can never leave
you can never leave
Track Name: we had a deal
why oh why
i guess we played it by ear
time goes by
i guess we weren't quite clear
we had a deal
i guess it wasn't real

no oh no
i guess it's over so i hear
how things ought to go
i guess we never got clear
we had a deal
i guess it wasn't real
we had a deal
i guess it wasn't real
i guess it wasn't real
Track Name: she's upside down
she has a common expression
and she is actual size
she has an ominous foreshadow
and a finger for every toe

She is a steam radiator
she is a lucky strike
and she's an apple a day by day
running rings around the AMA

and she's upside down
and she's off and on anyhow
and she's all here and now
again

she's always got an answer
she is a loss for words
and she's an agent for the BHA
and so she's not allowed to say

she is a passive aggressor
she is a pack of lies
and she's a pyrotechnic display
running rings around the FAA

and she's upside down...
Track Name: lorraine
between the postman and you and me
between the holy ghost and the deep blue sea
between forgetting the words to say
and not knowing when to pray
we gave everything away

to lorraine
to lorraine

between the gun and the insane mind
between the almost sighted and the fully blind
there was no price they could ever pay
to make what they done ok
they took everything away

from lorraine
from lorraine

they came to us on planes
they came to us in chains
they came with only the full intention to explain

between the gun and the insane mind
the nearsighted and the blind
there's nothing that's left behind

from lorraine
from lorraine

between the gun and the insane mind
the nearsighted and the blind
there's nothing left to remind
us of lorraine
Track Name: tragedy
time
never had begun for me
til there was a reason
until i met you

those lines
normally don't come to me
and that is a reason
not an excuse

though everything i've ever done for you
was more for me
it isn't such a tragedy

time
messed with my destiny
and there was no reason
and i hardly knew

and time
would've took the best of me
and that is the reason
that i love you

though everything i've ever done for you
was done for me
it isn't such a tragedy

and everything i've ever done for you
was more for me
but it isn't such a tragedy
it isn't such a tragedy
Track Name: round and round
they say
in some weird way
we were made
for each other

but we seen
the lie machine
go round and round and round and round again

that's all we got now
that's what we got so far

he reads
the words he sees
in the hallway of the lavatory
as he's waiting

while on screen
the lie machine
goes round and round and round and round again

that's all we got now
that's what we got so far
and we wanna hear what the authorities are planning to do
but that's all we got now for you

and if you had half a mind
you never could be so unkind
we've taken it for the last time
and if you hang us out to dry
cross our heart and hope to die
you'll never work
you'll never work
in this town again

and that's what we got so far
and we wanna hear what the authorities are planning to do
but that's all we got right now for you

and round and round the accusations flew
but that's all we got now
for you
Track Name: someone like you
mess up a handstand in the dark
reach out in time
an adolescent remark

I'd like to know
someone so innocent and true
I'd like to know
someone so transparent as you

I figured as much but didn't say
been saving up
since that last rainy day

I'd like to know
someone authentic through and through
I'd like to know
someone like you

ten to one
after all was said and done
we had just begun
but we knew it was a long shot wager
ten to three
is when we all could disagree
with the powers that be
though we knew it was a long shot

You can count my meaningless demands
on the fingers of your empty hands
ten to one
we had only begun

mess up a handstand in the dark
reach out in time
an adolescent remark
I'd like to know
someone so innocent and true
I'd like to know
someone as beautiful as you
I'd like to know
someone like you
someone like you
someone like you
Track Name: foreign talk
i remember that time in september we got
stuck in the oakland rock slide
face on the TV and our fingers in a PBJ
i get when you tell me that living life is more than just
making carbon dioxide
laying on a lazy boy the entire crazy day

inside i wait
for any updates
inside i wait
for any news
all of the accidents
and arguments
and the distant views

now five months later i'd love just to hate her but that
would only feed the pretense
feet on the fender not strong enough to send her away

outside i wait
for any updates
outside i wait
for any news
all of the accidents
and arguments
and the far away views

it shouldn't come as a shock
i can't decipher the foreign talk
i'd just like to know
i'd just like to know

accepted reluctantly
all the secrets you got on me
i'd just like to know
i'd just like to know
I'd just like you know
to be sure

i beg your pardon
well i never
and there goes the neighborhood

outside i wait...
Track Name: search party
how did you say you got it
and how did you go about it

cuz i don't r.s.v.p.
and no one sends a search party after me
i can't go like you so
as far as i know it's fantasy

and how do you get invited
and how do you get requited

i used to count all the times
until i had a stockpile too high to climb
nothing's learned where I'm concerned
indifference turned its face toward mine

and there's no r.s.v.p.
and no one sends a search party after me
i don't know who stole the show
was not me though i guarantee
i can't go like you so
as far as i know it's fantasy
and nothing's learned where I'm concerned
indifference turned its face toward me